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The story of mommy and daddy (or, the most boring bedtime story ever told)

Do you want to hear the story of how daddy and I met? I asked the kids, at a loss for another plotline in the bedtime story about Teddy the Bear and Flower the unicorn who went to the Fancy Foods Show.

“Yes!”

Okay, because it’s our anniversary next week. Which means that’s the day that we first went out together. And we’ll be in Spain to celebrate. So let me tell you about what happened seven years ago and why it’s our anniversary and how you both got here.

“Okay!”

Well one day, I was very busy writing a book.

“And I was there!” Sage screamed.

No, not yet. So anyway, I was very busy and I thought, I have to get out of the house more. So I decided to take a class. A class where people…well, they tell jokes sort of. It’s a class where people are funny.

“Like I am funny!” Thalia said. “Want to hear a joke?”

Well, maybe in a minute. So anyway, there was this guy in class and he said his name was Nate.

“JUST LIKE DADDY!”

Well yes, because it was daddy and…

“Mommy and daddy and me and Thalia!” said Sage.

Yes Sage, that part came later So anyway, I said nice to meet you and he said…

“Nice to meet you!” said Sage. “That’s what I say. Nice to meet you!”

“Hey know what?” Thalia chimed in. “There’s a boy in my class named Nate.”

Wait, I’m getting to the good part! Do you really want to hear this?

“YES!”

Okay. I’ll skip to the part where daddy took me out to a movie. And at once point he said…

“I love you!” Thalia exclaimed.

Well, not quite yet. Definitely not that night…

“And I love you!” said Sage.

Yes, I love you too Sage. Do you want to hear this story?

“And I love Emily!”

Yes, we all love Emily.

“And Pipi! And Chorizo! And mommy and daddy! And Grammye and Grandpa! And Grandma! And Papa!”

Do you guys want to hear this story or no?

“No, not really.”

{ 24 comments… add one }

  • C @ Kid Things 10.03.2009, 2:37 pm

    That's pretty much how all stories go in my house. Start out with the best intentions, I don't think I've finished one.

  • Kat 10.03.2009, 2:47 pm

    Sometimes the sidetrips that the story inspires them to take can be as amusing as the original story itself. Enjoy the ride!

  • Elizabeth @claritychaos 10.03.2009, 4:58 pm

    but we want to hear it!!! :)

    congrats on your anniversary. we just celebrated ours a couple of weeks ago, too.

  • Angie 10.03.2009, 5:09 pm

    Hahaha..at least they were entertained!

    Happy anniversary, and have a great time in Spain!

  • Fairly Odd Mother 10.03.2009, 5:17 pm

    So typical! Hey, at least you got off with a short story.

    I pray my kids never, ever ask about how mommy and daddy met. It involves way too much alcohol, PDA and him making me pancakes the next morning. A bit much for their precious ears, y/k?

  • Mom101 10.03.2009, 5:36 pm

    Yeah FOM, mine was definitely the edited for television version. Ahem.

  • Momma Hunt 10.03.2009, 5:36 pm

    To funny, classic thought. Should you ever want to tell the story, your bloggers would want to hear it! Congrats on the trip and the anniversary!

  • Heidi 10.03.2009, 5:56 pm

    I feel your pain!! I really want to hear the story! Does that help?

  • sarah doow 10.03.2009, 6:10 pm

    But I wanna know what happened after “Nice to meet you”!

  • Amber 10.03.2009, 6:38 pm

    My 4-year-old always asks if she was in my tummy whenever she sees a picture of me pre-babies. I tell her no, and she doesn't believe me. Apparently I had the longest gestation ever, which makes it even odder that she was premature.

    Kids! They just aren't so good at the listening, are they?

  • Alexis 10.03.2009, 7:14 pm

    My kids definitely only like family stories if they are in them, so sometimes I just stick them in, even when they weren't born yet…

  • Lara 10.03.2009, 7:30 pm

    Bahaha, that's awesome. :)

  • You can finish the story for all of us. Have a great trip…ah, Spain…

  • Your Best Friend 10.04.2009, 2:02 am

    That's funny and sounds typical of kids.

  • mrs. q. 10.04.2009, 2:11 am

    Well darlings, it's funny. When I first met your daddy in college, he was a funky art student and I thought he was gay.

    [crickets.]

    Um.

    That means happy. To meet me. Because he was.

    (Luckily, the kids haven't asked for this story yet).

    Have a wonderful trip! JEALOUS!

  • the mama bird diaries 10.04.2009, 3:08 am

    This is hilarious. I feel like I can't get 3 words out without one of my girls interrupting me.

    Enjoy Spain!! Happy anniversary.

  • MelADramatic Mommy 10.04.2009, 4:19 am

    That reminded me of watching movies with my son:

    “Why are they doing that?”
    “What did she say?”
    “Where are they going?”
    “Is that a good guy or bad guy?”

    Happy anniversary and enjoy Spain!

  • Angela Moore 10.04.2009, 1:29 pm

    Yeah, that sounds like something my kids would do too.

  • Julie @ The Mom Slant 10.05.2009, 12:17 am

    On the other hand, they could have let you get through the whole thing, then asked “Are you finished?” and when you nodded they asked “Can I go play with Katie now?”

    You know. Theoretically.

  • Magpie 10.05.2009, 2:09 am

    But I want to hear it!

  • RookieMom Whitney 10.05.2009, 5:15 am

    Well told, Liz. I laughed, even though I am simultaneously watching Melrose Place and wondering if I am a really bad mother if I send my kid to school tomorrow after masking his cold with a large serving of Tylenol (not the recalled kind). Clearly I am honoring your storytelling about as well as your children do!

  • Jaelithe 10.05.2009, 2:33 pm

    But, but, but, what did he SAY?

    Aw, man, Thalia and Sage, you gotta let me hear the ending. This is my favorite kind of story. The romantic kind, with a happy ending, that actually happened in real life! I know it's boring now, but you'll appreciate it later. I promise I'll tell you a story about robot princesses from Mars conquering a toy factory right after you let your mom finish.

  • Elaine 10.05.2009, 9:13 pm

    I love this version of the story, interruptions and abrupt ending at all. Kids makes up postmodern.

  • Gray Matter 10.05.2009, 10:01 pm

    Liz, your peeps have spoken, we need to hear the story behind the story…

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