The story of mommy and daddy (or, the most boring bedtime story ever told)

Do you want to hear the story of how daddy and I met? I asked the kids, at a loss for another plotline in the bedtime story about Teddy the Bear and Flower the unicorn who went to the Fancy Foods Show.

“Yes!”

Okay, because it’s our anniversary next week. Which means that’s the day that we first went out together. And we’ll be in Spain to celebrate. So let me tell you about what happened seven years ago and why it’s our anniversary and how you both got here.

“Okay!”

Well one day, I was very busy writing a book.

“And I was there!” Sage screamed.

No, not yet. So anyway, I was very busy and I thought, I have to get out of the house more. So I decided to take a class. A class where people…well, they tell jokes sort of. It’s a class where people are funny.

“Like I am funny!” Thalia said. “Want to hear a joke?”

Well, maybe in a minute. So anyway, there was this guy in class and he said his name was Nate.

“JUST LIKE DADDY!”

Well yes, because it was daddy and…

“Mommy and daddy and me and Thalia!” said Sage.

Yes Sage, that part came later So anyway, I said nice to meet you and he said…

“Nice to meet you!” said Sage. “That’s what I say. Nice to meet you!”

“Hey know what?” Thalia chimed in. “There’s a boy in my class named Nate.”

Wait, I’m getting to the good part! Do you really want to hear this?

“YES!”

Okay. I’ll skip to the part where daddy took me out to a movie. And at once point he said…

“I love you!” Thalia exclaimed.

Well, not quite yet. Definitely not that night…

“And I love you!” said Sage.

Yes, I love you too Sage. Do you want to hear this story?

“And I love Emily!”

Yes, we all love Emily.

“And Pipi! And Chorizo! And mommy and daddy! And Grammye and Grandpa! And Grandma! And Papa!”

Do you guys want to hear this story or no?

“No, not really.”

{24 Comments}

24 thoughts on “The story of mommy and daddy (or, the most boring bedtime story ever told)”

  1. Sometimes the sidetrips that the story inspires them to take can be as amusing as the original story itself. Enjoy the ride!

  2. So typical! Hey, at least you got off with a short story.

    I pray my kids never, ever ask about how mommy and daddy met. It involves way too much alcohol, PDA and him making me pancakes the next morning. A bit much for their precious ears, y/k?

  3. To funny, classic thought. Should you ever want to tell the story, your bloggers would want to hear it! Congrats on the trip and the anniversary!

  4. My 4-year-old always asks if she was in my tummy whenever she sees a picture of me pre-babies. I tell her no, and she doesn't believe me. Apparently I had the longest gestation ever, which makes it even odder that she was premature.

    Kids! They just aren't so good at the listening, are they?

  5. My kids definitely only like family stories if they are in them, so sometimes I just stick them in, even when they weren't born yet…

  6. Well darlings, it's funny. When I first met your daddy in college, he was a funky art student and I thought he was gay.

    [crickets.]

    Um.

    That means happy. To meet me. Because he was.

    (Luckily, the kids haven't asked for this story yet).

    Have a wonderful trip! JEALOUS!

  7. That reminded me of watching movies with my son:

    “Why are they doing that?”
    “What did she say?”
    “Where are they going?”
    “Is that a good guy or bad guy?”

    Happy anniversary and enjoy Spain!

  8. On the other hand, they could have let you get through the whole thing, then asked “Are you finished?” and when you nodded they asked “Can I go play with Katie now?”

    You know. Theoretically.

  9. Well told, Liz. I laughed, even though I am simultaneously watching Melrose Place and wondering if I am a really bad mother if I send my kid to school tomorrow after masking his cold with a large serving of Tylenol (not the recalled kind). Clearly I am honoring your storytelling about as well as your children do!

  10. But, but, but, what did he SAY?

    Aw, man, Thalia and Sage, you gotta let me hear the ending. This is my favorite kind of story. The romantic kind, with a happy ending, that actually happened in real life! I know it's boring now, but you'll appreciate it later. I promise I'll tell you a story about robot princesses from Mars conquering a toy factory right after you let your mom finish.

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