I generally do not snark on weird baby gear that I come across. And boy, are there opportunities out there. But after working on Cool Mom Picks for the past year, I realize that that behind each one of those products, misguided though they may be, is someone–often a mom–who has poured her heart and soul into it. And so I forgo the priceless comedy fodder, even when maybe I could really really use it.

But we just received a solicitation from a company that I have to mention (but not by name).

They make a maternity accessory that’s not a bad idea, really. Helps keep your pants up, that sort of thing. Except that a large fits size 8.

One more time:

Large. Fits. Size. 8.

I want to write a response telling them that they’re alienating a good deal of their potential target. (To say nothing of the the two editors of CMP, neither of whom are a size 8 on a good day, let alone when pregnant.) I want to tell them they’re out of touch with the needs of real pregnant women. I want to tell them that the last thing they want to do is make pregnant women feel like they’re too fat to wear some stupid, overpriced accessory even in their first trimester.

But it wouldn’t matter. Not while they can tell you what celebrities wear their product and how many hot stores carry it.

So I’ll just go back to whining about my aching back and eating cinnamon Pop Tarts, watching my belly grow ever larger over the waistband of my not size 8s.

You can snark for me.

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Speaking of Cool Mom Picks (how smooth was that segue?) I have been remiss in pimping our Mother’s Day Gift Guide here. We spent a lot of time digging up creative ideas at all kinds of price points for all kinds of moms, including your own. May I suggest leaving the page open accidentally on your computer so that the fam gets a few ideas beyond serving you runny eggs and mediocre coffee in bed on the 13th?

Plus, there’s a contest! Oh yes. If you post the gift guide button on your blog and email us about it [info@coolmompicks.com] we’ll enter you in a drawing to win 2 gorgeous limited edition Jen Corace prints and cutest photo album ev-ah from Mahar Dry Goods, as well as a $250 (hello!) gift certificate from Zutano.

Speaking of contests (again, smoooooth) if you sign up for our monthly newsletter by the end of the month you could win so much stuff it’s ridiculous. We’ve got an awesome leather-trimmed diaper bag from Kathleen Baby filled with goodies worth 600 bucks. Details are on the home page.

Which you already know. Because you go there like, every day, right?