I’m finding this really weird thing now in that I actually have to play with my kids. I can’t just turn on Mario Kart for the Wii, hand Thalia a steering wheel that’s not plugged in to anything in particular, and say “look, you’re driving, honey!” any more.

(Okay, I can. And we did last night. But sometimes we can’t. Man, kids – they’re so high maintenance.)

So when I spotted a copy of Chutes and Ladders on sale at Target, I figured I had deprived my child of some great American board game milestone long enough. The age thingie says four, she’s four…she’s ready.

As it turns out, I was not ready.

Good God, this game is tedious. How did I not remember this important detail from my childhood? I remembered fun chutes, I remembered fun ladders, I did not remember a second-grader year-old could finish Ulysses by the time someone lands on that damn final square.

So I cheated.

Oh look! This chute goes up instead of down, isn’t that crazy?

A 4? Really? I could have sworn you spun a 2…which lands you right on this huge ladder that shoots you right to the top, wow!

Hey look…over there…what’s that?

I was shameless.

Eventually she won. Which was actually a victory for both of us.

Then, in a shocking turn of events, Thalia asked me to play Chutes & Ladders with her again this morning.

Again?

As in, you mean I don’t just get to play it once, check it off the list and put it away forever?

I’m screwed.