You know, you’d think that halfway through your Florida vacation, you’d deign to interrup your poolside lounging only to share the gorgeous photos of your kid alone in an inner tube for the first time. Or your toddler sticking her fingers in a fish’s eye socket. Or the gorgeous sunsets over the picnic table where the 11 of you eat fresh grilled meat (yay Nate) each night. Or the “art gallery” set up by the four cousins, full of finger paints and crayon drawings of cats and rainbows and dots and more cats.

But nope.

Because last night the adults – Nate, my brother Jeff, his wife Maggie and me – were given a free night on the town courtesy of the very doting grandparents.

So what does one do on the town when that town is OldLadyVille, Florida? Well the bowling alley was packed, the movie theater choices are not worth the price of popcorn, and we tried to go to the mini golf place following the iPhone Google Map directions – only it turns out that Monster Golf off Sample Road in Cyprus Gardens, FL is actually Monster Golf off Sample Road in Lafayette, Indiana?

We go to Dave & Busters.

I have never been to such an establishment before although I do recall Brett Michaels giving it the big thumbs up. And that was good enough for me.

Holy hell is it pretty much the funnest place on the planet–or at least in OldLadyVille, Florida at 10PM on a Wednesday night.

I’m not sure however which was the most pathetic aspect of the evening:
-The four of us scolding a ten year-old for cheating at the horse race game (Dude, two balls at once? That’s not cool.)
-The verocity with which we shot down enemy WWII fighter planes screaming DIE DIE.
-My score at Pop-A-Shot: 5.
-Nate tilting the stupid Wheel of Fortune game that pushes the coins into the well.
-A 40 year-old mom attempting Dance Dance Revolution in bare feet
-The fact that we earned 4,094 tickets.

What is the sound of one hand clapping because the other is holding 4,094 tickets? Maggie attempts to demonstrate.

Spending 4,094 tickets in the final 3 minutes before closing is no easy task, particularly when you can’t stop laughing. It is indeed challenging to choose amongst a roomful of piece of crap toys made by six year-olds in China, none of which you would pay 5 tickets for let alone 4,094.

A mere 2,000 tickets short for a Guitar Hero Wii game, in the end our four girls collectively reaped the joys of two battery operated dancing pigs, a couple of stuffed cow pillows, and a ring pop each.

Although as Jeff pointed out, the kids would have probably just as well played with the 4,094 tickets.