There’s something just painful about waiting in a cafe behind a skinny little thing with her skinny little ass poking out the top of her skinny little jeans who’s ordering the hummus sandwich but ummmm…I kinda don’t really want the bread so can you just put it on a plate with lettuce? Oh, and to drink, ummmm…a hot water with lemon?

All while I’m about to order the chocolate peanut butter brownie.